How to Handle a Messy Roommate

You will want to consider to what level of uncleanliness is your breaking point. You want to make sure you think about your battles and to what level unorganized becomes filth. For example, if your roommate leaves a single dish in the sink and then cleans up later that day, is it worth confronting them over; or if they have been stacking them up all week into a heaving pile of moldy dishes worth a talk? Remember, you chose to live with this individual, so they have some characteristics you appreciate, and do not let something like this get in the way.

You have dropped subtle hints to your roommate that the home is getting dirty, or you have made it a noticeable point that you have been cleaning up after them. They might not have noticed and are genuinely blind to the situation. Their prior living arrangement could have been different from yours. They might have always had someone cleaning behind them and didn’t even mention that they needed to clean up after themselves.

You should try a direct approach once your subtle hints are not working. You want to ensure you do not do this in a time of anger or irritation. You might bring up some examples of the times you had to clean up after them. The odds are they did not even know that they were creating a messy situation.

You will not want to come off as a dictator, so you should take the first step of creating what are considered common areas. These areas will be the spots in the home that you will notice are dirtier than others. The kitchen, dining room,  living room, laundry room, and shared bathroom would be great places to start defining common areas that need to stay tidy and politely state what neat and clean means. To cause less confusion, you will want to establish ground rules and expectations for tidiness and cleanliness.

Create a bonding time with your roommate, and have a designated day and time to spend together cleaning your home. You might find out that during the week, the place starts staying cleaner so that when the specified cleaning time is getting shorter because the cleaning has become consistent throughout the week. 

Make a chore chart if you do not want to have a set day and time of the week to clean together. A chore chart probably reminds you of living back home with your parents, but this action plan could solve everything. This process will bring attention to the areas they are in charge of keeping clean. They can see their failure, which might motivate them to step up their cleaning game. You will want to rotate the cleaning zone list weekly, bi-weekly, or monthly. By changing the cleaning routine, everyone will realize all the different zones and hot spots in the home and the effort it takes to keep them clean and tidy.

If you notice that the shared spaces are still a mess and have not seen any progress, you might suggest splitting the cost and hiring a cleaning company. Hiring a company will add to your expenses, but you can shop, find a reasonably priced crew, and ensure they only focus on the shared spaces. Your roommate might be more open to this idea.